So much secrets are hunting me today

So much secrets are hunting me today.
So much doings I have witness. Because I have arrived at the wrong time or because I was powerless to stop it. I wasn’t involve yes I wasn’t but I am guilty. I am guilty and tormented just because I cover them. I cover friends. I help them cover their shames. I help them escape. I help them stand when they were shaking and trembling. The advice I give them, the tactics I showed them are now hunting me. The silence I keep until today is worse than the evil ghost hunting me. I give them listen ears but today no one pay attention to my fall. Maybe because I wearing a mask of fake smile, perhaps their storms is over I am no more needed. Perhaps I am right, perhaps I am wrong.  
Everything is alright but the real fact is that I am dying slowly.  
So much secret are hunting me today.  
Till this day I can’t open up on it. I can’t afford to see friends fall because they become someone fathers, uncle, brothers, cousins, niece, aunts, mothers, husband and wife.  
Yesterday, that day, I did what I did that made judge me wrong because I have to protect somebody  
“What happens after killing is more tormenting than the act itself”    
I give them listen ears and today…. Today, I see no one.    
When day break, I wish night never falls again. Never.