deepundergroundpoetry.com
to my dad
I close my eyes and drown you in a dropped fist
just like I did with the anchor bitches in that hospital sink
and the nigger I raped like prison status display
(it's not about sex)
(it's about power)
fuck them then kill them
the trandscendant release
just like I did with the anchor bitches in that hospital sink
and the nigger I raped like prison status display
(it's not about sex)
(it's about power)
fuck them then kill them
the trandscendant release
Published 20th Jan 2010
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20th Jan 2010 11:18pm
ooh, I love that first line. it's a great hook, and the rest of the poem is just as powerful. great work.
21st Jan 2010 00:16am
aw thanks so much claire.. very kind words.. I try to put as much power in as few words as possible.. a story doesn't have to be 1000 pages.. you can get the gist (and quite effectively) in 8 lines.. thanks again for the compliments darlin' keep reading I'll keep writing
Anonymous
21st Jan 2010 11:39am
claire, that first line is a corker,as always your poetry shakes me and moves me nathan, loved it.
21st Jan 2010 10:58pm
yes the last person that commented on this poem liked the first line as well.. i would actually do that when I was in the hospital still very psychotic and delusional from my INTENSE mushroom trip I had about 3 weeks before I made it out of intense care and lost my leg.. I would pretend I was hold my dads head underwater with my eyes closed.. I got so into it in my imagination I could almost feel him struggling to get breath and get away.. Im so glad you like this piece.. thanks honey
22nd Jan 2010 1:24am
You are much like me, my poems consist of very few lines.
A very powerful piece, nice work.
A very powerful piece, nice work.
22nd Jan 2010 1:43am
thank you sweetie..most of my work is like that though I do write short stories as well.. but I like to explain a situation in as few words as possible with the most effect.. it can be done.. words are our guns.. drive the bullets into their chest.. so as not to be forgotten..
Anonymous
22nd Jan 2010 8:10pm
This piece is fantastic. And somehow, the violence and profanity make it seem even more beautiful. The idea of drowning in a fist is superb. You're a true master of dirty realism.
22nd Jan 2010 8:39pm
a master of dirty realism? shit! thanks man.. I'm happy to be called a master of anything.. I really appreciate that.. and I think its the way I incorporate profanity and any extreme visuals that make it art rather than just cheap gore.. I try to put stuff of a graphic nature in the throes of articulation and romance.. I see romance in my ugliness..
23rd Jan 2010 2:12am
23rd Jan 2010 3:54am
it's a very heart felt piece.. very emotional.. I don't talk to my father anymore.. he was an evil man.. take your time..
