invisible bruises

it's the type of pain
that doesn't show up in  
painted splotches
of red and purple
or blue on your body
 
it's the hurt that infringes
your innermost mind
that changes how you think
or how you act
living in fear
because of their words
 
it affects your heart
no longer able to love
how you are constantly  
scared of what your heart says
because of what they had always said
 
their words, hurtful then
still stigning now
etched into your brain and skin
telling you your every move is a sin
 
you doubt it even occurred
that your just making it up
due to the lies and manipulation
the gaslighting and constant fighting
 
it's the unceasing wish that you could  
go back and erase all the
hours, days, years, months, minutes, and seconds
you spent with them
because they told you  
that you had to

that everlasting trauma
you just can't get over
just wanting that closer
that release
from the suffering and agony
that consumes you in whole
every day
because of what that person had to say
 
that changed your world  
and makes your eyes leak of poison
poisoning your entire life
and leaving you with pain
that no one can see besides you
the invisible bruises.