Heaven and Hell

Sometimes I fear that everyone has stopped mourning, that I am the only one stuck between hades and heaven.

I do not know how to continue on, to wake up everyday in a world that you are not a part of any longer. It is as if I do not know how to breathe anymore, like I am gone too.

I fear that I am the only one stuck here,
Trying to piece you back together, willing myself not to forget your little habits.
Like how you’d like your coffee in the morning, and what color your favorite lighter was.

I am so afraid of forgetting you, forgetting how you laughed and how you would say my name. I do not want to be apart of a world that you are not in, I do not want to see the sky that you will not see. I do not want to feel the sun on my skin that you will not feel.

I do not know how to do this without you, I do not know how to live and breathe with the fact that you have left me, that I will never see you in the mornings, or make your morning coffee. I don’t know how to do this.