EVERYTHING AND NOTHING

when you were everything
and i was something
and then nothing

just like that

when i could tell
weeks before you said as much
with him in the next room
waiting
and my old boots
still under the bed
and the rain cold down my neck
and me thinking
goddamn
this is just like a fucking movie
except it hurts
almost more than i can bear

and how i wondered
what i'd done
thinking it was me
turning every memory over
looking for clues
when, goddamn, baby,
it was just you
seeking the savior
i never claimed to be
because that's what you did
and what you do
and what you'll likely die doing
and i know
it's not your fault

it's just who you are

and i could have told you
it'd end like this for you
and may have even said it
back when i'd become invisible
but it mattered not to you then
nor to me now

so, yes, i'll help
an old woman carry her groceries
and pile them in the trunk
and wish her well
but i'd do the same
for anyone

even you