Before I leave

Before I leave
Do you want to be together again?

Been 4 years,
See you one night a weekend,
Your more than that,
Let me show you.
I mean I love you.
I want a future with you.

It’s not what I want,
Now go to work.

oKaY

Heart dropped I actually felt the fall.
Keep your composure.
Put your shoes on,
Grab your keys,
You didn’t bring a bag or change of clothes,
You knew this would happen.
Walk out,
Say bye,
Drive away.

Before I leave,
Take one more look at his window.
Nothing.
Turn up the radio,
Girl sing along you love this song,
Yes smile,
You aren’t wasting any time now,
You can look at this negatively or positively.
Feel free of unsureness,
Continued inner questions,
Most of all your mental hold back.

Before I leave,
I’ll sit in my car no rush,
Before you drive away,
Whisper I love you,
But I love me more.
Now drive.

Sing.
SINg.
SING!

It’s okay to cry.
4 years is a lot.
It’s okay,
Your okay.
Me, myself, & I.
Scream if you have to,
Yes!
Let it out.
Breathe.
It hurts but some habits need to be let go of for major growth.
Your growing.
Be proud.

I love myself.
I finally loved myself enough.
I tried.
Can’t say I didn’t.
Now move on.

“Have a great day.

I respect you.

I'm going to move forward okay. I love you forever.”

It’s okay to cry,
It’s hard.
It’s understandable.
It’s life.
You were finally strong enough to love yourself.
Be grateful.
Be happy.
You are deserving.
Now walk into work like nothing happened.

Before I left,
Why didn’t I say what I planned to.
Why couldn’t I tell him how I felt.
How my heart felt like the string holding it finally wore out.
That how could 4 years not mean something.
How I tried everything in my power to do what I thought was showing him I loved him and not appreciate it.
Allows me to come over,
So intimate,
But throws me aside like trash.
I’ve never felt an emotion physically drop inside my body before.
Why was I not enough or worth trying for.
Why was my time wasted?
Why couldn’t I say that,
Before I left.

Your growing,
He can’t show your worth it,
Then show him you show yourself that you are.

I love you.
I love me too.
Goodbye.