The Weathergirl's Prayer

 
I pray
that my radio microphone
will not burst into flames
so everyone watches
while technicians throw water
over my fat arse
which is carefully guarded
under normal circumstances
away from close
or full on camera shot.
 
I pray that the fortunes I paid
to the Royal Balinese School
of Arm Movement
will recoup my investment
and earn recognition from
producers and directors
 
I pray there may be no
Michael Fish moments on my watch
confusing hurricanes with storms
and that no malicious in-studio wind
will ride my skirts
high around my thighs.
 
I pray I will not cry
frown
or laugh
but that I may smile
permanently on camera
and be the perfect
weather girl
 
Amen