Leah's doom

The pillow was pressed ever tighter against my face.
Try as I might, I could not gasp enough air.
I was dying.
I was being murdered.
But the hand holding the weapon was not that of an enemy, nor of a stranger.
It was of a friend, and even more intimate, a husband.
I knew he loved Rachel more. But I thought that it didn't matter.
I thought he could have us both.
And then I felt the life in my stomach kick and hiccup, and I realize why I must die.
I am with child, while Rachel is barren.
And neither my husband nor my sister, no matter how much they love me, can stand the thought of my child being the heir.
Of my unloved womb producing the Son of Promise.
Rachel is here.
I can feel her presence, just beyond.
She is hovering, watching Jacob with her brown eyes.
Same as my brown eyes.
We have the same eyes, same hair. Same teeth, same smile.
But her eyes sparkle while mine weep, and her smile is bright where mine is soulful.
Soulful and sorrowful from years of being second best.
I never resented it. I never resented her.
How could I? She’s my sister.
We knew each other before we knew anything else.
We played together, grew together, dreamed together.
We would have married together, except she found love first.
And when our father arranged for me to be the one under the veil,
What could I do?
Rachel is here, and if I know her like I do, she is looking on with tears in her eyes.
Tears in her eyes, and a hand on her empty stomach.
Unlike my stomach which bulges with the life within.
We had always thought we would be with child together.
That our children would grow up together like we did.
Except then I was with child, and she was not.
And as my child grew, so did their plan.
Hers and Jacob’s.
I do not hate them for killing me.
How can one hate someone you’ve loved forever?
I just wish my child could live.
I wish my son could be born.
I gasp once, and my lungs have taken all they can hold of dust and cloth and thread.
The world spins, and Jacob and Rachel are gone.
Everything is dark.