Early Shift

You go to bed early each night before me    
Leaving me all alone until I become weary
And lay down beside you, though you are not conscious    
Of this present world, but I desire to be with you and this is  
The only way I can join you - Hoping we find each other in a dream  
Then when morning comes, I awake to find myself alone  
And you have disappeared going to some place unfamiliar to me  
I am lost and muddle through the day and stare out the kitchen window  
In late afternoon or early evening waiting on you to return  
Then the dog begins to bark knowing the sound of your car even before it comes into view  
And I am happy you are home again so we can share a meal and talk about trivial matters  
Before you lay down early and drift away from me again, resting for work, your early shift  
   
Is this how it will be if you precede me in death? Are you training me for that now?  
I suppose I will still muddle through each day longing for your return and missing you  
I will struggle with life and yearn to leave this conscious world so that we might once again    
Find each other in a dream, to somehow be reunited and talk of only the important things  
And when morning comes. I will wake up alone and you will be gone and I will be lonely  
I will stare out the window as the dog waits for your return not knowing you are gone forever  
I will be lost without you and I will miss our menial conversations and our meals together  
I will miss lying beside you and your smell on the pillow and in the sheets, touching you  
And I will miss you like the dog misses you, not fully understanding why you left us  
And why you aren’t coming home, after you laid down and drifted away from us    
Resting for your graveyard shift