Tempted

I can't think
My world is upside down
I've tried meditation
But silence
Is too loud

I can't feel
Other than this pain
I've drank myself to sleep
& cried myself awake

I can't write
Trying to find inspiration
In all the wrong songs
The sad lyrics
are too happy
For my broken heart

I can't think
I can't feel
I can't write
The darkness
Is not letting in the light

I've allured death
It has a grip on me
But she finds pleasure
In the torture
Of life

I'm trapped
I haven't attempted
But I'm tempted

I must go on
For what?
I have no more
possibilities
I'm at a dead end
Ironic isn't it?!
An end without death

~poetisa, maría dé Jesús
10/19/18