THE ME I AM

From birth I was created and born out of a song that wasn't really love only lust of the skin and flesh but yet my life was not my own, as it belong to my mother who gave me birth to have life but yet that wasn't enough for it left me fatherless, with no man within my life to teach me on how to grow to be a real man raised by his father but all I had was just this empty feeling buried deep within my soul pulling at my heart questioning did he ever loved me his son.                                                    
                                                                   For as the years came and gone I grew up in an dysfunctional atmosphere that never felt like home were I felt safe and loved for even as those days and months passed by, my mother decided to marry a man that was not my father who was an abuser and a drinker of hard stuff for once when he got his mind fucked up, I became his punching bag as my own mother stood by saying nothing but that's why you need a man in your life to keep someone like you in line.                                              
                                                                     
For after to many years of the mental and physical abuse I fought back with the hatred that has been building up in my heart and mind making me cold as ice with evilness buried deep within my soul, but what it got me was a 5 year stay for a crime that I did out of abuse of my younger years but yet upon my release the streets is were I lived away from the abuse at the hands of someone eles.     But as time moved on and I grew up on the mean streets of East New York Brooklyn were hustlers roam among the dark shadows of the night upon the streets, that will teach you wisdom and knowledge from those who will show you what is real honor and respect, for a hard life that takes more than it gives for through those trails and tribulations I learned to crave my own way of life but even that came to a crashing end before it can begin as again had to pay the price in prison for living that street life.            
                                                                                                                                   But through all that I have been through and gone through it was my grandparents who saw within me that which that I couldn't see of thyself for it was my grandfather who taught me, how to be a real man and stand upon my own two feet to be me that which I have now become, as a man of heart and soul with emotions and feelings to know love with understanding with honor and respect to love the me I am.