Beautiful Moments

I don't want to write about beautiful moments
If I'm not right about what they are
It gets me too close to my emotions
When it's probably better to keep them far
Not so far that I can't reach them
Because I need to stay receptive to touch
Just can't take them out of my pocket
So that I don't feel too much

My inner voice is pleading with me
To capture the beauty in snapshot view
It doesn't seem to remember the bleeding its seen
And all the shit that I've been through
When I've spilled ink on screens
And displayed all that something means
One-sided perspective gets too bright like high beams
Don't find meaning alone, danger screams

I've been a part of beautiful moments
Or so I feel like that's the case
I don't need something to show for it
That really can't be erased
All I know how to write are feelings
But raw expression can be a waste
Scared of what once seemed safe
My unfiltered emotional space

I kind of wish to go back to that deep place
Because I remember the good it used to do
But I just don't know if I can anymore
Or if I should even try to relearn how to
I wish I spoke a different language
That my words didn't illustrate both good and bad floods
So I could just enjoy writing as an artform on the surface
And not feel all the things it does

Cuz now I don't want to look at beautiful moments
At least not thoroughly
I don't want to see the wrong thing
And have it end up hurting me
So I greet and embrace the beautiful moments
And stay laced in gratitude as they pass
Keep their existence here with me
Just not in collections visible through glass