King of my Heart

King of my heart, why don’t you come to me?
I’ve done acrobatics across the world,
Been this and that from sea to sea,
The opposite of what I was, what I never thought I’d be.

King of my heart, I have constant unrest.
I long to draw you to me, but you leave me powerless;
I come to your wall, but find it covered in hieroglyphs.
I had hours of speech prepared but when I open my mouth
I cannot speak your tongue,
And I do not know how to reach undertow and pull your body to mine.
But it’s not my body you touch, it’s in my heart that we converse,
And if we lived only in that world, of emotions,
Without resistance we’d instantly join.

But in my whole state, I burn and burn.
Once I quiet my body I hear you clear
Ringing through my heart, your place.
Our room resides on the upper floor
But on the ground level sits the door
And between the two there is no staircase.

You think me quiet; you’ve made me mute.
King of my heart, not a trace of the brute
Do I find in you, being so refined,
So sensitive, in yourself confined.

What have you done? You’ve burned me away,
Made me a marriage with the air.
My body is like my guard dog, bounding
Its movements of which my heart doesn’t care;
It has its own story, but I am not there,
I wait for you, king, beside your chair
By the window that looks out to everywhere,
But you are not to be found there.


Just now for a moment I had barely a taste
Of loving the same as I loved being by your side
Loving our break and divide.


08/01/11