Joy

 
Tired stories of sad girls who write poems
about boys who almost loved them
I am tired of writing poems about boys who almost loved me
This poem it’s not for you.
This poem is for me.
I’ve spent years trying to remember
trying to remember
trying to remember why you left me
There’s no time for that now.
This is a poem about me taking my life back.
Taking my joy back.
I let you convince me that you were the source of my happiness.
You had buried my joy so far beneath my pain
I was convinced it was not there.
Had I known that my joy
was purposefully placed at the top of a mountain of pain.
I would’ve scaled it a long time ago.
This poem is for lost girls whose joy is perfectly planted past your pain.
This is a poem about boys who convinced us they could save us.
As if we hadn’t created the mountain they were so scared to climb.
This is a poem for you.
A girl who’s scared of her own mountain.
Despite what he has told you,
That mountain is not too big.
That climb is not too steep,
That boy cannot save you.
It is time to save yourself.
Trust me.
When you reach the top.
You’ll see