Goodbye

Verse 1
God forgive me for my sins, I can't live like this
My conscience is too strong, i need your forgiveness
There is too much burden pressing up my chest
Maybe I should swallow pills and go to rest
That would not change a thing, everything would be the same
Only my body will be gone, nobody would remember my name
I know you can hear me now, when I pray and when I cry
Begging you to make me stronger when I look up at the sky
Your the only one who knows that I've tried
To be a better person when i cried and swallowed pride
I repent for some things, I know i was an asshole
Committed so many sins now i know not where to go
So I'm turning back to you, hoping you can cleanse me
Purify my heart, change my life, don't stress me
And my wounds bleed, I've fallen to my knees
I came to a dead end, you know what's best for me

Verse 2
Bad things happen, I just have to write it
Part of me is missing, and I still can't find it
Lost in the childhood, didn't realize it
Now I put pieces together, trying to analyze it
I try to solve the puzzle, to find my inner piece
I almost completed it, just missing just once piece
Emotional wreck, not trying to disrespect
To my father I say fuck you, because you were never dad
You was just kinda there, fulfilling the emptiness
My mom is the real hero, you just caused a lot of stress
I gotta retain my sanity and my brain
There is nothing to explain, I have to get back to my lane
Or else I'll end up fucked, willing to take my life
[Suicide by hanging, or slitting my wrists with a knife]
Leave this world in a hearse, it will be my last ride
I can see them dry their eyes
As they say their last goodbyes

Verse 3
Been thru so much pain, countless tears I've cried
I probably deserve it, I'm a sinner, I won't lie
Sold my soul to the devil, and I know it very well
Heaven ain't meant for me, final station is Hell
No matter how much I pray, I don't see the brighter day
Pain is growing stronger, seems like it won't go away
So I'm turning back to God, hoping  he'll make it right
Cause I'm about to lose my cool, if he don't show up tonight
My soul is bleeding in the booth, sick thoughts in my mind
I want to continue living, but I got the urge to die
Maybe I will find the peace, somewhere in the afterlife
Let someone else be happy, I'm willing to sacrifice
I came from a broken home, I never had a place to go
When I'm sad and feeling down, I would never ever show
That is one way to live, but I decide what to do
God save me a place up there, I'm coming to visit you