Me

I have bright eyes
I know when to smile
Behind my eyes inside my Brain are sad lies
Bad things happen to me but it’s been a while
I try to hide behind a mask of I’m fine
When really I want to be dead this life is mine
So if I don’t want to be here isn’t that my decision
But I’m called a slut a whore I’m told I’m seeking attention
So I just lock myself away and make another incision
God it’s like I’m in a mental detention
Everytime I get close I mentally make a note it’s going to destroy me when they leave
Because the people I let in are all liars and broken and they know how to deceive
I just want to be happy
But it’s like I’m doomed to always feel crappy
Until I finally take the plunge with that blade
I’m finally free and my blood starts to cascade
I start to fade and my soul drifts away
This is my fucking decision nobody else should have a say
But I’m a fuck up I can’t do right in life and even my death would disappoint