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Dreams of Bravado (A Badly Made Bear)
When they handed him to me the first time
and told me: Love him, aah...
Didn't they notice that serious stare
the upside down smile
and the space between Teddy's eyes
Didn't they realize
how the smallest details
a few careless stitches from a tired hand
could shape my life
mould it, break and shake it
all the way from toddler to grave
That's why I frown sometimes
when you cuddle me
and why when we sit
side by side on the sofa
your smile feels three feet away
but I am not my frown
there's a smile behind it
only for you
At the bottom of the garden
I have built a fire
to pile high all those things
I wish to unlearn
and one mad brave day
I will light it
to dance around the flames
and fly with the sparks to freedom
But for now
surrounded by resolutions
in my habitual way
I'll just stare and frown
at my dreams of bravado
as I continue to cope
with the consequence
of a badly made bear.
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