Total loss of my famly

Falling out of life
Trying to hold on
No handles are found
Slipping all of the time
Further
          and
                 Further
Into this darkened life
No helping hands for me
Leaving me to fall

Death has came for me before
The bitch let me live no DNR
live for what
To be all alone, and
feel my hell on earth?

To stay alive and feel what she wants me to feel
Her control, her lies, no effection, no loveliness
she wanted to make it hurt

Gone...
Everything taken from me
Lost everything that I have built and cared for.
Family all gone

Now I miss everything I was put through
Never able to make things right
To be forgiven for my wrongs
Never to understand why
To see them grow up
Years to build... gone in seconds

I see them from time to time
Only when I feel
I have taken lives
Now I know what it is when it's taken from me
This is my hell now
This is my death
This is my life

Why am I here?
We are made in pairs
Pairs mo longer
Who am I here for?
Repent for everything ive done wrong?
Is this the way
To write those wrongs?

I love them all.

You guys at DUP help me feel the things I can't. Reminds me the
Beauty of life and try to have some closure for the dead.
To remind me how fucked up the living can be. For I am
one of those.
Thanks to those who help me feel...
Life through your eyes and your writes