A letter to send?

Just the other day it has been ten years since I have been back in Australia I don't know if this 10 years has seen you fair well I don't know if you even still even care I don't know if you know how hard I've had it and I am basically writing to you because it's been to long and I want to connect with you,
I know you would probably have a bf and why would you not but that does not stop me wanting to talk to you, I don't know if you know the last time I spoke with you on the phone and I had to tell you that I could not do it anymore it was that I did not want you fuck that is far from the truth it was taking to you was killing me because I wanted you and we weren't together and you told me repeatedly that we where over,
I want you to know I harbour no ill toward what happened I know and remember what what you said to me but I did not want to face that what you was saying was the truth remember what you said to me before you went up to see him?
You asked me is it possible to love two people at the same time and I never thought it was possible but now I do because I love my partner and I love you I don't know what you feel about that if you still feel anything about that at all?
I have driven myself crazy this last 10 years missing you like crazy writing over a 1000 poems to try and get you out of my system I'll will admit right now even though it would not of made a difference back then because you could not bare to look at me after what happened, I choose to listen to everyone's else advice to try and stop loving you after two years of us not speaking I listened and got rid of our wedding photos which I regret doing and all it did was cement it in stone how I felt and still feel,
I know you probably could never try again but I had to tell you how I am feeling and over this time period for me at least nothing had changed I know there is a lot of water the bridge so to speak but my feelings have not changed towards you,
I also want to ask you do you still have the shadow poem? If so could I have it as a last thing that you can do for me?
Do you remember our wedding? It was perfect how could I ever forget the way the kids looked they looked so good and you omg You were stunning, anyways I'll catch you on the flip side I'll go now and let you be and please don't feel bad and you don't have to reply this is just something I had to do.

Take care sincerely

Raymond