THE "FORBIDDEN FRUIT" (  IN HER OWN WORDS)

I neva thought I'd feel this way abt anyone, I've done walked so far, too deep, into ur orchard until you've entered a realm in me.. Like adam &eve i've picked & eaten fruit from the forbidden tree.. That i neva knew existed until i found u, i've been down this road many times in my life before with the discovery of happiness as my pursuit.. Only to be led astray, derailed, & left feeling empty with broken promises, lies & betrayal.. But all that bounded itself to my past, as soon as u gave me a taste of ur fruit i seeked & sought, so much time has passed i feel so distraught.. And even though we departed this taste for u still lingers in my mouth, it's so sweet, it's soo strong, not just physically, but emotionally, and mentally, you've reached that special part of me & made ur mark,am i foolish for succumbing to my yearning heart? Am i stupid for holding u so dearing? Maybe so it feels so forbidden.. I feel like ur lessing ur presence, in an effort to give me an oppurtunity to taste & experience the fruit of love from another tree.. And while i understand, u need to understand that's a decision that's mine to make, i want so bad to enjoy the fruits of ur yesterdays.. I understand that cant be, it hurt's but to kno but i live each day in constant wonder in momentary fear & someyimes insanity wat the fuck have u done to me? Do u understand how i feel? As i get better, im still hopeful blinded by tales thoughts of wat could be real.. Not realizing this isnt even up to me anymore, I hold on desperatley to the fruit of ur tree, to wat i think is still mine but knowin, i cant have u is so forbidden.. No one understands my mindstate , i dnt kno wat direction i want to turn in, i just hope that direction ends upin ur arms again but in a more fruitful relationship..Those lies & cheating, that betrayal u brought that back into my world, and i done it to myself - isnt it funny how history repeats itself.. I look back on wat i've been thru and say wat i should've, would've, could've did, But we cant change the past, we gotta look ahead.. we cant go backwards we can only move forward u see, U got me thinking that forward motion does'nt include me, my feelings for u runs so deeply.. I feel so foolish for feeling this way thinking u were all mine, after all this time, after all this pain.. Im just a fool why does my heart still crave for the forbidden taste of ur fruit? no one can ever fill ur void,they can never take ur place, someone tell me why do i still crave for ur taste? i've taken the backseat and it feels like everything abt u comes before me.. Tell me why do i keep walking thru ur orchard eating fruit from ur forbidden tree of lies, pain, misery & untruth, Oh well i guess we alway's want what we cant have "THE FORBIDDEN FRUIT"