deepundergroundpoetry.com
I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
I etched a fence - a cold water fjord
to hoard myself
to keep these shores from you
And I cracked some stencils
my pencil pressings
come on to strong;
so I leave myself
where I please
The lines...
they think they know how they should lie
Oh,
the confines ease their eyelids closed
at night
But they detest;
us, the stabber of gaps
in their tidy
typical packaging
Red, raw eyewhites blink...
we cheat them of their dividends
of sleep
to hoard myself
to keep these shores from you
And I cracked some stencils
my pencil pressings
come on to strong;
so I leave myself
where I please
The lines...
they think they know how they should lie
Oh,
the confines ease their eyelids closed
at night
But they detest;
us, the stabber of gaps
in their tidy
typical packaging
Red, raw eyewhites blink...
we cheat them of their dividends
of sleep
Written by
AtoMikbomb
Published 22nd Sep 2018
Author's Note
Fuck them. Fuck them all. Just be free.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 10
reading list entries 4
comments 14
reads 779
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
22nd Sep 2018 1:04pm
Excellent pen! Love the flow and rhyme! Fjord is a great word. I had to look it up to refresh my memory, it's been so long since I heard it.
The imagery of that final stanza is remarkable, AtomikOne!
One nit:
* cough *
come on to(o) strong;
The imagery of that final stanza is remarkable, AtomikOne!
One nit:
* cough *
come on to(o) strong;
1
Re: Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
22nd Sep 2018 6:05pm
Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
Anonymous
22nd Sep 2018 1:05pm
This (admittedly I don't read enough of your work) is in my opinion the strongest piece I've read and favorite of yours for me. The second stanza is incredibly profound to the poems drive. Excellent ink...Sin
1
Re: Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
22nd Sep 2018 6:04pm
Oh my...thank you. I took a long break and I'm striving toward striving less through my work. Less overthinking, more heart <3
I appreciate that deeply!
I appreciate that deeply!
Re: Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
Anonymous
23rd Sep 2018 10:01am
I'm barely writing but yes less is sometimes crucial to cranial function...I'm a fractured damn...some pun intended. (And peculiar spelling) again fantastic piece pls feel free to direct me to more gems. Sin
1
Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
22nd Sep 2018 6:59pm
I wonder if all art making is a process of stabbing gaps. Great image. Thanks for sharing!
1
Re: Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
23rd Sep 2018 4:28am
Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
22nd Sep 2018 8:35pm
this was beautiful I have always had a love affair with paper and pencil I still write this way, there's a certain something about it, I could never kinda put the feelings in word, not surprised you could and did!
thank you for this one :-)))))
thank you for this one :-)))))
1
Re: Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
23rd Sep 2018 4:29am
Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
23rd Sep 2018 4:27pm
Love love love this ... crisp ... fresh ... original ... weave short lines in and out ... great flow ... perfect cadence ... such an expression of freedom ... killer closing stanza ... this is what great poet looks and sounds like ... bravo my dear poetess ...
1
Re: Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
23rd Sep 2018 11:56pm
Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
23rd Sep 2018 9:53pm
Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
24th Sep 2018 12:57pm
Strong ink poetess, fierce in the face of adversity.. feelin it! Love the second stanza.
1
Re: Re. I've outgrown the need to tiptoe
24th Sep 2018 8:56pm
Thank you dear NBB <3 I've been feeling poems like this too lately. I feel like I could never exhaust the need in my heart to write along this theme either...