iDose! The final toast

Hello again my friend your presence to me seems so seductive
Inhaling every scent till there’s nothing’s left I’m self destructive
The effect made life less painless I fell in love but grew dependent
I fill with hope as life loosens it’s grip and my mind begins descending
Regardless of the side effects it’s love I feel I’m certain to defend it

I’d rather live delusional, day dreaming I’ll feel out of touch to what is real
Zip and seal or tare and tie that dub or dime and if it doesn’t burn its going next in line
My brain might not recover but optimistically it’s less deadly to what your told in lies

I’ll be honest that I’ve had the thought of burning out or even that sometimes I’ll die
I know your love was never real and that’s the reason I retry
It’s worth the risk I take in exchange for how I feel living this lie

Slowly I’ll become desensitized to love, life, pain, and being lost
This numbing Infects my entire life starting with my gums, nose, and any moral thoughts

My one complaints that you never stay, just make me feel less sane so I can play
I’ll dose until the end is close and my body i can’t keep in control
Disoriented I’ll collapse sometimes my body starts a victory dance I’m literally convulsing

Metaphorically slowly descending into a grave of quicksand with a drug in each hand
Anxiously I’m coming down awaiting for my depression to take over as it hasn’t ever failed me
With every shot I down, another friend my anger surely dropped
If instead for fun I load the shot and plunge into the pool without a hope I’ll ever stop
You’re never going to make me stop not until I hit the top
As we start to settle down of course I start to feel like I’m a fucking clown
The jokes on me without a doubt I’ve lost my mind I see it now
As we start to drift apart and fade away, I’m glad your here but never stay
Take away this illusion of love you made and leave me now I hate the pain!
Goodbye my friend until we meet again my names iDos! I wish you sunny days.