Mother Memories

Mother dearest
I remember
the morning you pushed me over
in the bathroom
and the toilet seat broke
when my body hit it

Mother dearest
I remember
you hitting me
In the face
and calling me stupid
over a math problem

Mother dearest
I remember
you telling me that
you would kill yourself
that it was all my fault
because you didn't want me

Mother dearest
I remember
you bringing me
a bottle of booze
so you had company
getting drunk

Mother dearest
I remember
You calling me a whore
and giving me away
so you could have a life
with  your new boyfriend

Mother dearest
I remember
you telling me
you had no daughter
But you had two new
wonderful sons

Mother dearest
there has been silence
For over 25 years

And finally

you did kill yourself
with booze and pills

and I had no part in it

Mother dearest
Rest in peace