Too strong to admit

7 years passed
yet until today had no idea

i gave myself to him
because if he broke my heart i could take it
i thought

hooked up on every opportunity
because they where no feelings involved
i told myself

while away, posed an occasional hello
because i was just trying to be polite
i chose to believe

joyed over his promise to be there forever
because well loneliness may strike
I reasoned

shared a lot a lot of moments with him
only because I'm selfish and was using him
it makes sense right?

he rung me up today to say he was going away
it shouldn't matter right?
i was just stringing him along... or was I?

AND THEN IT HIT ME!!!