Mom's Monster

I was my mom's child only for a little while

Around 10 years old when I was first defiled

Filled with trust where innocence bloomed

He called me into my mother's bedroom

Dirty old man called it playing around

My first experience of holding sound 

I never saw 10 the same way again

Ahead of my youth already fearing men

A fear of monsters who touched my private parts

Even with the lights on, I was afraid of the dark

I was different

I was dirty

I was ashamed

Not ever wanting to play again

Mom needs her  man

I need sleep

I cant wait to steal some peace

Trying to explain, I bring her pain

Hard to understand with this child-like brain

He's quick to spit verbs and used up nouns

Once again winning another round 

Call the preacher! Call the preacher!

The devil lives in this child!

This is my future husband not some damn pedophile!

I'm praying to God about a man he made

Maybe now he's really saved

He sings in deep tones on Sunday mornings

Loves to quote scriptures and biblical warnings

Abuse from the man that touches my mom

Screaming inside while trying to stay calm

She's cussing at me like it's my fault

Taking it to school, too tired to be taught

On duty at night to watch the younger ones sleep

Gotta lay awake before he steals their peace

Back in church again

Beginning with sins

He's right beside her

He always wins