tragic, really

it's all these things i want to say to you
i can count by my fingertips
right, left and
back to the right
more than ten fucking reasons
that don't make sense
you rot
you rot
you're fucking rotten

countlessly i'd like to say
thank you for
waking me up to who
you really are
i couldn't stop loving you
until now
this second
this day
for you are the eye illusionist;
you carve hurt in our hearts
only to
reflect it upon yourself
just to say
the blame is on us

since the day you sinned
the blame's on us
you
sick selfish scum
i can't even speak right with
the frustration clogging my
mind
eyes
heart

self-pity - it's all you.
i could laugh to the way you
mess your own mind up with
false accusations and
sorry stories about
how we hate you

when really
'hate' never was a word in the book
nor was 'end'

the spotlight shines forever
on you
and we are the cause to your pain?
what about our pain?

it's not us who never apologised
it's not us who forgot love, no
it's not us who never said 'hi'
- you were the one who walked away

without any reason
every fucking thing you ran away from
shit

but you can't fucking remember
for your thoughts are plagued with
new ways to drown yourself in
fame
and friends who are not worth your time

labelling me cheaper than
the one cent under my foot
is more satisfaction
to me
for i know who wins
in this game

beat yourself up
for no one else will waste their time
doing it for you
- not anymore