Mother

I used to dream there was a fire
I still sometimes dream that there was a fire
Sometimes I get out
and sometimes I don’t
But either way I’m left uncomfortable with all that I have  left behind
I am so dependent on my records and my blow dryer and all the in between
Yes I admit it
And I don’t think thats so bad
I don’t think it makes me any less fulfilled
Than you
Or her
Or that nun that told me God was always watching me
Making me more scared of Religious figures than the monsters in scary movies
Mother, Please stop trying to solve my fear of the dark
With telling me the blessed mother is with me
I don’t want her in here
 I want my privacy
Thinking of her only gave me nightmares of statues with blue veils coming to life to kill me
You not believing me
How could you betray me like that
mother

I remember telling you
About my failed assassination
You said
 if that ever happened you would always believe me
So what happened
Why don’t you always believe me
Mother


I dreamt  there was a fire recently

And I couldn't wake up

I heard you calling for me

But I couldn’t get there

I woke up sweaty and tear stricken;
 
How could you betray me like that
                                                                          Mother ?