My Conscience Binds me To The Wounds

I lay wide eyed in conversation with my conscience...I need him, but I have to be here don't I?
Smiling faces look to me for reassurance so I make my bed but my mind takes slumber in another's eyes.
I yell to myself to snap back from my imagination running along with the tide of what my heart wants so that I am alert to the one that speaks gibberish.
How does one listen to criticism? How does one sit beside one that deny's me my confidence?
How do I listen to another's opinion of me, after seeing myself from my own perspective?
Heart beats, still blood in my veins, still life in my bones and yet you hold me here in chains...chained to my destruction when my heart beats steady in his chest!!!
You hold me too grasp nothingness when something is possible!
Round and round you beg me to spin when all I want is to sit in the silence in the arms of my love.
No! ...he needs to know my heart still begs for the taste of life he fed me, that I'm suffocating...chocking on ash simply waiting for him to drown me and breathe again from true desire's lungs.
How long will you keep your ropes tied tightly around my neck? How long will you allow me to hang your curses ringing my throat before you cut ties?
I could use a breath of fresh air now, but instead I stay in this state, in this bed while my heart lays alone half way around the world....I should be wrapped tightly in his binds and free of all aches and scarring wounds.
I need him, but instead I crumble to die an early death with you.