The Yellow Line

"Train approaching, please remain behind yellow line"

I'm sitting with my friends on a green, metal bench
Not even 10 feet away from the track
My bags are in my car at the hotel still
I've only got my wallet and keys

"Train approaching, please remain behind yellow line"

There's nothing between us
Just a small step to help people onto the rest of the platform
I feel the ground shake slightly below me

"Train approaching, please remain behind yellow line"
It's fathers day
I've known since I woke up
I made it a point to not call or email
It hurts

"Train approaching, please remain behind yellow line"
Happy families catching the train from Mansfield into Boston
Smiling children and teens calling home
Grandparents rejoicing when they hear their ringtone

"Train approaching, please remain behind yellow line"
From the second I opened my eyes I felt it in my chest
It's been building and building and building
My hands shake
It's getting loud inside of my head
I can't think

"Train approaching, please remain behind yellow line"
I stand up and take a deep breath
I take one step forward
And another
And another
And another
And suddenly I am at the tracks

"Train approaching, please remain behind yellow line"
Kids and parents look at me
My friends are confused
The train isn't stopping
My heart keeps beating
And...

The train flies by going over 100 miles per hour
The whistle of the wind hurts my ears
I don't flinch or move
I see my own reflection on the metal car as it flies by me
I see my own death, the one thing I've been so desperate for this whole time
My moment is now, it's here

My body wants to step forward
My emotions want to step forward
Everything is screaming at me
THIS IS YOUR ONLY CHANCE, STEP FORWARD
STEP FORWARD
STEP FORWARD
STEP FORWARD
STEP FORWARD

I took a step back