NIGHTSHADE PERHAPS  (1990, North Park, San Diego, California)

     
four thirteen        
a m      
i tossed        
and turned        
right out        
of bed      
either      
too much      
in my stomach      
or too much      
in my head      
in fact      
its almost      
more restful      
sitting up here      
listening        
to the steady      
trance like      
pouring rain      
percussing      
on the      
roof top      
up above      
my pending dreams      
still as yet      
not come      
i hope      
as well      
as with      
its further off      
hushed      
more distant      
crackling hiss      
outside in these      
sleeping      
rain drenched      
dreamtime slithering
unseen
nocturnal streets      
slap splash      
singing      
raindrop echoes      
dancing upon      
wet  cracked  broken      
shimmering      
cold concrete
sidewalks      
down below      
just outside these      
darkened      
indoor walls      
and late night  
blinded windows  
from off      
the sudden edge      
of choiceless      
letting go      
rooftops overhang      
surrendered to      
this wet
late nights      
soothing free falls  
sky born
cloud dropped   
fluid spell      
upon all life
all things
touched here
down below     
with some      
staccatoed  rhythmic
tap dancing      
against      
louvered glass      
of angled      
kitchen windows      
partially opened      
window panes      
in varied tones      
of sing song      
notes      
sweetly sung      
in pelting taps      
along with      
trance inducing      
background        
gutteral sound      
of night skies      
purging run off      
moving through      
guzzled down      
rooftops flowing      
swollen drains      
whose collective      
choral songs      
vibrationally mesmeric      
hypnotic sound      
so primal      
in its essence      
hypnagogicaly      
filtered through      
this present state      
of silent witness      
in my absorbant      
quieted mind      
both seem      
and feel      
as if theyve    
now somehow      
at least      
temporarily displaced      
the usual      
random flow      
of another kind      
of inner flood      
of restless thoughts      
incessant trickling      
through my brain      
subliminal teardrops      
dragging their sleepless      
streaming tails      
cool  wet trails      
synaptically vining      
their stubbornly      
insistent way      
with unanticipated flowers      
and thorns alike      
springing quickly forth
popping out
up and down      
my captive spine      
persistently most nights      
subconsciously obstructing      
my much preferred      
innermost need      
and desires      
innate urge      
for increasingly quickened      
higher        
kundalini flow      
despite my body      
and minds      
equally greater need      
for more rest      
and restorative sleep      
now bringing      
and leaving      
me here      
at this late      
transcendent hour      
through mystic      
hypnagogic      
dreamtime raindrops      
fluid song like    
spell      
left here now      
with only whatever      
inspired insights      
reflective vision      
or lesson      
i may      
or might not      
ever come to      
see or learn      
to reap      
or glean      
from this resultant      
subtle gift      
of my passively      
attuned      
receptive attentions      
organically arisen      
nocturnally blossomed      
dreamtime poems      
lucidly descriptive      
captured impressions      
freely opened      
self expressive      
meditative      
run off  flow      
wherein here      
even now      
within the naked        
seeking heart      
of this deeply    
submerged      
deceptively sensed    
moment in time      
in which i  
seem      
little more      
than a      
thirsting plant      
nightshade perhaps      
enjoying the inner      
and outer dance      
of lifes continuous      
pranic electricity      
presently flowing  
so effortlessly      
through me      
here now  
in this sleepless    
wee hour    
to somehow      
counter balance      
to comfort      
and soothe      
so much relentless      
otherwise foreboding      
uncertainty        
somewhere a bit      
too near      
the seemingly    
hopeless borders      
herein this murky    
self suppressed    
sunken  dark    
inner sea    
of despair      
where my own    
mortally  wounded mortality        
and my ironic        
yet somewhat      
much lesser anxiety      
of the still      
only slightly      
frightening odds      
premature probability      
of much too      
soon again      
reuniting as one      
with the ineffably      
wondrous truth      
of my immortal      
soul itself      
in some subconscious    
abstractly conceived    
yet equally    
innately intuited    
potentially co created    
into some eventual    
possibly more literal    
manifested way    
of actually becoming    
this even    
further evolved    
consciously    
quickened    
being    
i am still  
yet becoming  
both here within  
and beyond  
the ever continuous  
flow
of and herein
this late nights
rain purged
sacred  
now