The Silence and The Fear

"The roses have wilted
The violets are dead
and demons run circles
Around in my head."

"It is scary what a smile can hide."

~I don't care about myself at all anymore
I've pushed it all away.
not just to the side
but out completely.

~It has gotten to the point
where even if they DONT need me
I'm still giving the entirety
of myself to them.

~I will always go
out of my way
and out of my mind
to try and save someone.

~If I did not solely care for others
I would be completely
Numb.

~There is not an ounce
of compassion
left in me
for myself.

~I was asked once...

if I fear the sleepless nights
but no one seems to have any idea
how long it takes the sun to rise
when you fear closing your eyes.

~because even in the city,
when the sun goes down,
there is indeed the absence of light
but when you're staring
at the backs of your eyelids,
that darkness grows deeper.

~Now I realize
overthinking
can drive you mad
and end up killing you

~so I tried to silence
my heart and mind.
Turns out
SILENCE
can be a serial killer

~Murdering
one good thought
after another.
Then it moves on to your Will Power
Thus, Becoming a kind
of fear.

~ and I'm sure we all know...

"FEAR is the mind killer".