It’s Equality We Seek

 
Do feminists really seek full equality
Do they fully realise what that means
They say they have no need for me
But vibrators can loosen the jar lid
They can change an electrical plug
Vibrators can’t carry heavy loads
Or mow the lawn, or open doors
Feminism is such a weird conundrum

Imagine the situation, a house fire
Women and children get rescued first
Are mean suddenly inflammable
We will not become black and crispy

Imagine the situation, a plane hijack
The negotiators arrive and set to work
They try and get the women and children off first,
Apparently men’s bodies do not blow up

Imagine the situation, a sinking ship
As the band plays ‘nearer thy god to the’
The women and children get to the lifeboats first
It is accepted that men can breath water

Imagine the situation, there’s a bump in the night
Down stairs there’s a machete wielding psychopath
Under threat of no sex the man is forced to investigate
Apparently men’s skin is stab and bullet proof

It’s amazing how quickly a hard nosed feminist
Can turn back into a delicate lady, or just a girl
When circumstances of risk and danger appear
Their need for special assistance and treatment
For being a lady, a girl, a woman or a mother
I think this establishes the gender’s equality
Ultimately human beings are completely selfish
They will fight, argue or beg for self preservation  
And usually at all or any cost to other bystanders
Especially if they just happen to be a white male
I am not crying or negotiating for my gender
I’m just attempting to point out two things
Firstly women and even feminists don’t want full equality
Secondly the genders are more equal than we think
When it comes to our more base instincts for survival