imagination

you've never left my imagination
and maybe you never will
but maybe it's time for me to adjust
and separate facts from what is real. . .
in my fantasies,
you kiss my neck and whisper in my ear
but in this reality
you're not even here
you're far away
so far, impossible to reach
and sometimes i get knots in my throat
and I struggle to speak
it's just your affect on me. . .
you numb, weaken, and paralyze me
but back to reality
where you've only lied to me
manipulated me. . .
into locking you in my soul forever
ruined thoughts of happily ever afters
became happily ever nevers. . .