Living Room

the calculations here, the hints and implications that feel more explicit and dirty than they are if i read it cold. the heat is between the lines, i like that effect.

the last little stanza is technically fine but the feel of the poem is all but lost for me because it's *so* perfectly rhythmic and rhyming that it sounds nursery rhyme-ish for a finish. otherwise, nicely done in my opinion, and welcome to DU. [:  

I am with you, Jes, it is very "rhymy" compared to the rest.  Anyone - feel free to help me rewrite that last stanza.

You change it, or don't. It's fine. Don't let the professors fool with it. Before you know it you'll lose your erection.
Okay, if you want to change it...don't have the word "me" twice.
We know it's all about you, no?

Nice back-handed slap to the face at someone else's comment.  And then people wonder why others don't critique.

Let's just unanimously say this poem and every poem ever posted on this site is utter perfection personified and leave it at that.  No further comments required.

Yours
Professor X

I read your poem with great interest it reminded me of a younger me just married eager to go thank you

good poem