deepundergroundpoetry.com
Shelf Life Of Forever
Thick slime dripping mind
Festering wound of a rusty tongue
Keep the lessons that will come
Lying butterflies with small guns
To see you soon, bitter a little bit
Kissing family to nibble and knit
Me a prison of anxious teeth
And so be it
Awake for days
Shelf life of forever isn't good enough
Even dressed as an act of love
Pickled me in my brine
Left in this emptiness of mine
To it I talk all the time
And slave over your mayday-calls
To catch the cat as it falls
Bullet severing sleepy skin
Infected; my irreversible tint
But I'll only brag about you
Always a reason
My transparent mind in weaves
Gathering stains on every sleeve
Cousin let each memory slip
A plethora of cursing bit lips
Shelf life of forever isn't good enough
Not on its own, not dressed as love
Festering wound of a rusty tongue
Keep the lessons that will come
Lying butterflies with small guns
To see you soon, bitter a little bit
Kissing family to nibble and knit
Me a prison of anxious teeth
And so be it
Awake for days
Shelf life of forever isn't good enough
Even dressed as an act of love
Pickled me in my brine
Left in this emptiness of mine
To it I talk all the time
And slave over your mayday-calls
To catch the cat as it falls
Bullet severing sleepy skin
Infected; my irreversible tint
But I'll only brag about you
Always a reason
My transparent mind in weaves
Gathering stains on every sleeve
Cousin let each memory slip
A plethora of cursing bit lips
Shelf life of forever isn't good enough
Not on its own, not dressed as love
Published 2nd Jun 2016
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
3rd Jun 2016 1:40am
I enjoyed the language of this poem, the images were concise. However, some of the syntax is strange to force your rhymes.
3rd Jun 2016 5:44am
Thank you for the input and honesty. I do try to create strange and somewhat distorted imagery, I try not to force things but I can see how it would come across that way. I'm always tweaking my style to prevent forced rhymes. I appreciate the feedback
Anonymous
3rd Jun 2016 4:18am
Wow, this is like crawling in the movie ' Being John Malkovich' I feel like i need to park myself here for awhile to absorb it all.
This is amazing Anon, I"m curious to know the inspiration for this?
This is amazing Anon, I"m curious to know the inspiration for this?
The inspiration came from an experience with someone I know, how they treated me and promised me the world. The "shelf life of forever" is them basically promising me immortality and other outrageous things. They'd lead me along and leave me feeling alone, then spin it so it would seem as though I was to blame. The line about the cat falling is them putting me through arbitrary trust exercises. Plus they lied and made me buy into the lies which felt as though my mind had been infected. That's the inspiration for most of it, there are some other things here and there.
Glad you stopped by for a read and shared your thoughts Vee. It is always pleasant to see you around.
Glad you stopped by for a read and shared your thoughts Vee. It is always pleasant to see you around.
