deepundergroundpoetry.com
Immaterial Girl
Coca-Cola promises
swallowed flat
Bright lights
drawn to burn
Half lies in half measures
fading aspirations
as Ad-mans billboards in the sun
Capitalistic disillusionment
chasing dreams...or mirages?
Snared to the System
a world I have no love for
feeling alone while yearning
for simpler quite ways
To a past I've never known
swallowed flat
Bright lights
drawn to burn
Half lies in half measures
fading aspirations
as Ad-mans billboards in the sun
Capitalistic disillusionment
chasing dreams...or mirages?
Snared to the System
a world I have no love for
feeling alone while yearning
for simpler quite ways
To a past I've never known
Published 23rd May 2016
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 4
reading list entries 0
comments 4
reads 746
Commenting Preference:
The author is looking for friendly feedback.
23rd May 2016 8:16am
Now this is good, bet it would be a killer spoken piece, it lives and breathes its message. Has a bit of a abstract feel for me, which I just dig also... Yoru friend: wolf
25th May 2016 7:08am
Heya Wolfie :) am playing around with the abstract...hopefully not going to far, am slowly getting me head round that it allows us to avoid the dread cliché and allows the reader a little more of their own thoughts into a poem
:)
:)
24th May 2016 7:58pm
I am with 'deadwolf' on this - I could hear this in my head as a spoken word piece - it is a great poem full of original lines, you really have your own style and it is most enjoyable to read :-)
25th May 2016 7:10am
Is only taken about 4 years to find that style LOL..and advice and time from many writers far better than meself
Cheers David :)
Cheers David :)
