Wabi-sabi

   
I'm done      
Tired of their toxic waste      
Polluting my mind      
Defiling my soul      
Contaminating my body      
Haunting my dreams      
     
     
I'm through with this      
Done now      
     
     
The path ahead is arduous, long, terrifying      
I have moved beyond that concern      
I will move through it like wind      
                                                                           ~ a tumultuous tornado ~      
     
And rain      
                                                                            ~ a torrential typhoon ~      
   
Cleansing all in her wake      
I am thoroughly sick of living like this      
Forever a victim to all their many depredations      
     
     
These wounds are festering, rotting deep inside      
Stench unbearable      
Pain horrifically debilitating      
     
     
The work of self-surgery, even with aid, still requires      
Reaching into raw, gaping torment      
Grasping hold      
Willfully tearing out that which is gangrenous, putrid, reviled      
     
     
Tis an act requiring courage and betimes in that I am lacking, admittedly      
Nonetheless, this MUST be done      
Tis imperative      
And, further, I REFUSE to live this way any longer.      
     
     
Why should I?      
I, who have done naught wrong in this      
I, the one molested and raped repeatedly      
I, a child, then teen, then adult      
Victimized      
Keep suffering???      
For what I did not do?!      
     
     
I am done with this, I tell you.      
I have done with this particular mess!!!      
I am reclaiming as much of this scorched and salted human terrain as I possibly can!!!      
Tis mine, ALL mine, scars and all, mine alone. To give or not. To share as I please.      
I am repairing with that which is precious as in kintsugi, kintsukuroi.      
Wabi-sabi applies to me.