My friend-a rendezvous with pills

I've sat here picking at old wounds for days...feeding the scabs to a flame that isn't even mine...I should have seen the signs.
I should've asked.
You look so sad.
It brings to mind a mugshot.
I didn't know you were imprisoned.
My screen couldn't tell me that your demons were raging...I couldn't imagine that your pain had taken the wheel..and started making plans for you.
Maybe I'm in denial...maybe I don't want to admit that you would do this.
I want to be mad at you...just like you would be mad at me...if I had ever hurt you...or myself...if only you could hear how loud I'm screaming at you...for you.
I want to make you laugh again...just to hear my old friend.
I want to entertain you..just to see you smile...and finally wipe my tears.
(c) 2016 Jamers Mitchell