Can't let the pain win

I look at you and I see stars
A million or billion miles apart
In between are my thoughts of you
Forever wondering, pondering you
 You may see me as a misfit
But I promised to treat you right
And through my works
We never saw eye to eye
 They say love heals and destroys
But in the moment we're lost in the ploy
The world fades away
Troubles seem to fade
So why did you trade?
That for a cheap thrill?
Did I matter?
Was I just another phase?
These questions, run through my head
Day by day
And each day I realize you're gone
But I have to push on
Because I can't let you win