Charge, The Russian's Tale

 The Charge of the Light Brigade is a well documented glorious cock up of British military history. But what was is like from the Russian's point of view?

Cavalry’s approaching in the distance sir
They’re just taunting, have no care
Don’t even bother to load a gun
Don’t waste a shot on that lot son

They’re closing sir now at the trot
Load the guns but hold your shot
Cavalry don’t charge guns, it isn’t done
But lance and swords glint in the sun

Are they mad? We’ll cut ‘em down
They must be led by a total clown
Six hundred metres sir and closing
Doesn’t look like they’re just posing

Right lads fire at my command
We’ll send ‘em to the Promised Land
At five hundred metres he shouts fire
Their situations looking dire

Shot rips through the tight packed ranks
From the centre outward to the flanks
Men and horses scream with pain
But still those silly bastards came

Load with canister, double shot
The next will scatter this stupid lot
Three fifty metres can hear their cries
We can’t believe our very eyes

They’re charging now to meet their doom
In muzzle flash and cannon boom
Reload with haste and aim again
Grape shot spews its lethal rain

Our shot rips through them so many dead
Are they feeble in the head?
Turn back you fools and spare your horse
But they don’t heed my shout of course

No time to reload they’re almost here
On they charge I’m filled with fear
Thundering hooves and murderous cry
Soon will come our turn to die

In amongst us banshee screaming
Try to run from the sabres gleaming
Dash and slash wheel and thrust
We gunners bleeding in the dust

And at the end of that awful day
They simply turn and ride away
Nothing gained by either side
A monument to foolish pride