Forever In Doubt

For so long I have disassembled myself
Transformed into what you wanted me to be
I made you happy and I left you content
You left me unwanted and made me sick
So sick some days that I couldn't help but bleed
So sick on the inside that I forgot how to breathe
I died inside daily just to make you proud
But my tears of pain and sorrow just weren't allowed
Emotionless and consciousness is all I ever could be
And all I wanted from you was to mean you loved me
Eventually you let me go
As I clung to your words
Dropping me harshly into the wild
Where I learned to smile
I forgot your name and I forgot your taste
But I'll always remember the dead look upon your face
I learned to live without you
I learned to breathe without you
I even came to be myself again
Even when my world was falling down again
I met a bright light and brightly it shone
Casting light on my body and caressing my soul
Guiding me through the dark forest of my head
Leading me and loving me, just like he said
Words truly mean nothing
Not to me, ever again
But your actions speak slowly and distinct
I can see your darkness seeping from your skin