Bad times

So much has changed....
my life is a bother
to every one and anything
i'm no longer a mother

she's out of my life
a phone call each day
but i still hear it....
i still hear the smile on her face

she misses me....
i hate myself
why couldnt i put the damn drugs down
but its the hand i've been dealt.

i love her...i love her....she's coming back i know it....she will

someone help me.