crimson deep

When I was being raised in the ways of the Church, I'd often be really scared by visions of Hell, and the ever pending Armageddon that was going to rip the believers from Earth into the glory of salvation. There's a lot of this almost fire and brimstone imagery in here: the pulsating seas, the parting clouds, the crimson moon.

The whole poem reads as a bit of a metaphor for abuse, which is how I perceive it. On a constructive note, in the last line I can't help but feel the word 'walking' is a little redundant. I think that last line would just read better without that verb, though that is totally just my own opinion. It certainly doesn't detract anything from the imagery.

There's layers to this. An enigma code.

It's funny, the way I write is basically me describing what I visualise when I'm trying to tell a story, so the image of a person who appeared to be walking on the Crimson moon, from the perspective of a man-eating shark watching its prey tread water, kinda needed to stay in the poem.  
 
Anyway, thanks for pointing out the weak line in the poem.  You pretty much forced me to deal with the problem, and as a result, I'm happier with the poem.  Thanks heaps for the constructive feedback and for your sharing your interpretation of the poem, Missy.

Typical Case 😜

Only took you 5 months for a response. Practically greased lightning. I can finally put away that scarf I started knitting whilst waiting for a reply. It now reaches Australia.  

(...Of course, I fkn jest, and you're very welcome sunshine 😊)

excellent work very cinematic in feel and pulse - have missed your wordsmithery (yeah I just made that word up) but you know what i mean :-)

great stuff :-)

Thanks, Mr Macleod.  My apologies for not not replying sooner, but my muse ain't knocking on the door, so I ain't been deep underground much these days.  Viva le wordsmithery!

It's another world on the Ocean floor, not for humans.  This piece reminds me of those depths that I never want to know...

Great writing Alexander.   I've been out at sea on fishing boats, for too many hours at a time, the mind can play havoc with a person out there.  You have captured that feeling in this poem.  :)

I've had a few shark encounters in the ocean, I've felt the fear and the fear is very real.  I'm stoked that you thought I captured that feeling and I appreciate you dropping by to comment, Magdalena.

Beautiful lines here Case
"Mort is metallic brine"

Brilliantly visual and visceral

I'm always stoked to get read your thoughts on my poems, whale.  Thanks heaps for your kind words.

it's a courageous venture, to follow Hemingway out on the stormy sea.
exquisite adaptive poetry...

Hemingway is one hell of an inspiration, I couldn't hold back the visual imagery the man conjured in my mind.  Thank you for the awesome comment, Mr Feddeler.