Big Game

 I am strange, in that I like to pick my own heros
Rather than have them thrust upon me by peer pressure
It never ceases to amaze me who society deems brave
Recently my time line has been inundated with glossy
Images of ‘big Game Hunters’ standing tall and proud
Over the bloody carcases of animal they’ve assassinated
I am not impressed at all, any fool can pull a trigger
If ‘Big Game Cowards’ want to impress and be my hero
Then they must fight their chosen animal weapons free

I want to see you;

Box an angry kangaroo
Head butt a charging rhino
Pull the tail of a tiger
Claw a hungry lion
Charge a rouge male elephant
Drop kick a crocodile
Arm wrestle a polar bear
Stick your arse in the face of a baboon
Neck slap a giraffe
Bite a wild zebra
punch a mountain gorilla
run from a cheetah
knee a water buffalo on the chin
play stone , paper, scissors with a rabid honey badger
dance cheek to cheek with a wallowing hippo

What? No takers?
No ‘Big Game Heroes?’
Like I said;
“Big Game Fucking Cowards”
I am not anti gun, but if you want the right
To bear arms then you have the responsibility
To arm bears and all other hunted animals
Nobody would fuck with a wild heard of African
Elephants trained to kill, carrying AK 47’s
Or a mountain silverback with an M16
Or an angry grizzly bear with a pump action shot gun
Hunting wild animals currently creates no heroes
Just sad cowards who need to be shot and mounted
But not necessarily in that order