deepundergroundpoetry.com
Forever....
Is forever just a dream?
Was it all just make believe?
Never wanted you to leave
Wasn't trying to deceive
I want you like I want life
Willing to love you and give the ultimate sacrifice
How can this end
When you are forever suppose to be my friend
I want you forever near
Losing you is my biggest fear
Can I just stay in this dream eternally
Where I am with you and you are with me....
Was it all just make believe?
Never wanted you to leave
Wasn't trying to deceive
I want you like I want life
Willing to love you and give the ultimate sacrifice
How can this end
When you are forever suppose to be my friend
I want you forever near
Losing you is my biggest fear
Can I just stay in this dream eternally
Where I am with you and you are with me....
Published 9th Jul 2015
| Edited 14th Jul 2015
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The author encourages honest critique.
9th Jul 2015 2:05pm
The last line of the second verse makes no sense. I think you might have skipped a word or used wrong tenses. Clean it up a little bit and it will give your poem a smoother flow.
14th Jul 2015 10:14pm
