Monster, Stop! (Collaboration with GoodOlBoy)

You, my loved one over there...
Don't you look at me
With compassion in your eyes,
I don't deserve it.
I'm the worst kind of fraud.
Loving and gentle most of the time,
blowing in a split second,
unable to control the word
Vomit spewing, yelling,
Tugging my hair out,
Stress increases,
Monster appears,
Lashing out,
Make him hurt,
Suffer the way I do inside,
Curbing the viscous tongue not an option,
Painful truths thrown in his face,
Never striking him,
Never stabbing him,
But cutting just as deep.
You call me perfect,
Nothing is further from the truth,
This thing inside,
Hold it in until I burst,
He doesn't care anyway...
Just takes it because
I'm all he's known.
I'm not worth the hope you offer,
The love we share...
I'm not good enough for
The trust you extend...

STOP!!!!!
No more!!!
No more listening to your own echo!!!
No more internal mutilation!!
No more screaming at a wall!!
No more dealing with this manipulation!
He stole all these years of your happiness
For his own selfish needs
He has used a beautiful person
And abused a wonderful woman
You cried to me on the phone that night
That you told him how you felt
You told him how worthless he is
And he threw it all right back
Not by yelling or screaming
Not by raising his hand
He beat you with sympathy
He made you feel bad for him
He made it your fault
He made you think that you were wrong
He passed his problems onto you
And you took them with open arms
That's what he has always done
That's how he always wins you back
That's because you have an enormous heart
That's because you are a truly loving person
But there is something he didn't count on...
ME!!!
You think you don't deserve to be loved...
You think you don't deserve hope...
You have NEVER been loved!!!
You have NEVER been given hope!!!
You have NEVER been treated as you should
You have NEVER been treated as a woman
You have NEVER been respected as a person
You have NEVER been treated as a wife
He's always used you, and he's using you still
He's kept you and his own kids at the bottom
Of life so they would not know any different
“NEVER TRY, THEY WON'T KNOW WHAT THEY'RE MISSING”
But he will, probably, improve himself...
Just enough that you forget
Then he'll drop everything again
Let you take care of him again.
But you still got the better out of the deal
You took him for a ride
You got 2 beautiful little girls
That's the only good thing to come out of that relationship
In my eyes...
This is how I feel
This is why you should be really happy
That I'm not on the Island
If I were, I'd be in jail...


Wonderful lines, GoodOlBoy. I'm proud to have written with you once again!
~Stormi~