Why him?

A bright mix of a different race.
4 years old sitting present at the court case.
She's cute, but won't amount to anyone's taste.

Police sirens, bright lights, let it be over.
My intoxicated father, the vodka made him slower.
           
I play alone in hospital rooms.
6 years old watching him inhale shrooms.
Thrown brooms, loud BOOMS, drunk before noon,
Where is my tomb.
Locked doors, grown up poor,
my mother lies unconscious on the floor.

Why him?
My eyes dim, she looks at me and sees only him.
A spitting image of a man who hurt her, took her, loved her, left her all at once.
My brother died that day, he lie curled in her stomach for only two months.