Seeing the truth

Do you know how i'm feeling. Do you care that I'm hurting, do you know what your doing. I stand like I'm a dummy like I can not move.I use all my energy to find a good substitute. I try and try but sometimes I don't know how to choose. Sometimes I feel that things are not right but i shadow it with my feelings and all might. Blinded by the lies but what can I do I'm still deeply in love with you. But your endless shelflshness keep peeping through. So I say to myself can I find a better you. I think it through and through about what I should I do but my mind keeps telling me you need to see the truth. Remember dear grandma who went away, now I say to my uncle, man i'm missing you. But when i turn for comfort you was awful so cold. Thinking that day I can have someone hold. Now I think deeply if really did love me tell me now, why didn't you hug me.