Let me find you.

i have a tendency to run back to the
things that got me here. puffy, red
eyes worn like makeup. searching,
half-blindly, for black and white
moments that once teased them.
once. when my music was your steady
stealing of oxygen amidst the silence
of screams. you hit the highest notes
when you morphed the air into language
and spoke to me. or  when your passion
burned so furiously that even I caught
on fire. but it rained when you left,
the water soaked the flames.  
now all that's left is smoke, angry at the
wind and angry at your name. it's grey.
it is the in-between. it blocks and
blurs the view. but my eyes are still
looking,  searching for memories,
searching for you.