Rest easy my loves

How do you explain the gut wrenching pain of loss    
You don't      
Just go day by day trying to fill the void    
Fill the silence      
The emptiness    
Distraction only takes it so far    
Because when your heart starts to pound    
and you can't stop the tears from flowing    
It' reminds me of what was once there    
and how it left me      
I'm alone now    
Not a picture or sweet memory    
Makes it go easier    
   
When I watched you take that last breath  
I lost a piece of myself      
that meant a lot    
and it wasn't just a blow to my heart    
It Fucked with my head    
made me wish I never knew you    
never hugged you      
and you should've taken my memories to your grave    
because it's to hard to think  
to painful to breathe  
That is true love      
And I wish I never had it